Insight to the power of three
I don't suppose there's a Blogger in the world who hasn't linked to the home page of professional nutter Gene Ray. You know, the Time Cube guy. Always good for a laugh. Anyhow, 'ole Gene's latest posting has got some people worked up. In it he suggests his fans go out an kill any teachers who ignore Gene's pet Time Cube theory.

"Tis Time to kill any educator who does not teach Cubicism above cubelessness. To save humanity from extinction, like prior civilizations perished, youth must redirect self teachers, or destroy them. Stupid Educators know of the Truth I speak and know that it will indict them as the most evil bastards on the Earth. Dumb ass educators fear Gene Ray and his Time Cube Creation - and they run from any mention of Time Cube Debate. Only a dumb student can be educated - as in brainwashed and indoctrinated. Time Cube debate denial is educator evil. It is not immoral for students to kill all educators who ignore Nature's Harmonic Time Cube or suppress free speech rights to debate Time Cube Creation Principle. Ignorance of Time Cube is Greatest Evil."

Seems straight-forward enough to me.

Anyhow, just in case you're interested, there is now a fantastic little Time Cube Personality Test available for you to take. The good folks at The Cubic Society based it on Gene's own philosophy and the "results will be custom-tailored to describe your personality exactly."

So take the test already! I took it and found the results almost spookily accurate. Remember, every second you waste is a second wasted!

P.S. While we're on the subject of cool websites which I may, or may not, have mentioned on this blog before, good friend and disgusting sleaze-bucket Justin points me towards this. While the individual in question isn't wearing much of anything, you may feel that the artistic and scientific merits of the page far outway that disgusting fact. Anyhow, I don't think he's likely to get a chill.

Kieran considers
Nine days in and already this getting up at the crack of dawn, ironing, showering, shaving, running for an over-crowded train, working all day before running for an over-crowded train, getting home, falling asleep and then waking up again at the crack of dawn lark is starting to lose its appeal.

In retrospect, I don't think I gave sitting on my arse all day watching TV, reading and surfing the web it's full due. Now that by-gone epoch seems rather like the halcyon days of my innocent youth.

Alas, alak and like that.

Now, here comes the comprehension part of the blog experience. Answers on a postcard.

Q. Reading between the lines, what is Kieran really complaining about?

• [a] The contradictions inherint in the system
• [b] Not getting any
• [c] Lack of sleep

On the subject of sleep, I've discovered yet another reason to complain about it. Something weird has started happening to me in the past month or so.

When I wake-up and open my eyes they seem to go into a kind of instant "Zoom mode." I raise my droopy, sleep-encrusted lids and for some inexplicable reason they change their focus automatically with a kind of automatic crash-zoom. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me, or why this has suddenly started happening, but I find it very odd. I know it sounds kind of cool, but there's a real downside to my new-found freak of nature status...

If I wake up with my head tilted left, this crash-zoom thing fires at my black Ikea wardobe (long story). On top of the wardrobe sits a small 4:3 TV set. Hanging on a hook screwed into the side of said wardrobe is a suit in one of those zip-up suit carrier bags. As I awake, my eyes freakishly zoom in on this charming idyll, and my sleepy mind chooses to interpret the TV as a rather large head and the jackety-thing as a jackety-thing and consequently sees a person. The impression only lasts for a quarter of a second, but it turns out that a quarter of a second is all I need to freak myself out completely.

Weird, huh?

Has this kind of thing happened to anyone else, ever? I've never heard of it before. Probably only happens to mad freaks who are just about smart enough not to tell people lest they be shunned. Something I can but aspire to.