Hits been an interesting week
It's been a slow week for me, blogging-wise. I haven't posted very much; I've had other things on my mind. Yet, in a way, I haven't had to post much at all because people have been visiting this page in droves. Oh sure, you say, that's obvious from the total lack of any recent comments. Well, they may not be commenting, I'm not even sure they're reading, but they're arriving alright. This is all thanks to a certain puppet-dog, a rapper and an experimental dance musician (who shall remain nameless).

Ever since I posted a piece on Monday about the fracas at the VMA's, I've had huge numbers of Google referrals from people interested in the story. By some quirk of fate, Google places me on the first page of links about the story, which means lots of hits for me, and plenty of disappointment for Googlers.

So, for people here for the Moby, Triumph and Eminem piece, you can scroll down till this past Monday's entry, or click here.

Frankly, I wish I was getting more Virgin Goats referrals. As you may be aware, Google ranks this site number one in the world for Virgin Goats, yet so very, very few people seem to be searching for them these days. Obviously folks aren't quite so particular about the calibar of their goats. I guess standards are slipping everywhere.

In related news, Google now ranks me the number two Kieran in the world. I was number six last time I checked. This can only be a good thing.

And while I'm in the business of helping visitors on a specific mission, any people here for the Marine Boy bit, that August 26th piece is now in the archives, but this is the link you were really after anyway.

Mr Bear is free!
Break out the champagne and party poppers kiddies, evil bear napper Cindi has seen fit to let the little one go on his way. She was sick, or something, but it seems when she got back to work at the Kalamazzo Post Office, all of her workmates ganged up and insisted she "solve the bear problem." No doubt they'd noticed all the postcards arriving demanding the return of the Kalamazzo One.

For all the gory details of Mr Bear's escape from Cindi's clutches pop over to Paul's site for an update.

Can anyone lend me $20m?
Lance "It is too a real name" Bass from 'N Sync has been given the old heave-ho by cash-strapped Russian Comsonauts and will not be flying to the International Space Station. The boy band member is packing his bags in Star City even as I type. According to news reports, Bass lost his spot on the mission when his backers failed to come up with the required $20 million fare.

While, of course, I'm heartbroken for the poor boy, I feel duty bound to offer myself as a replacement. As a kid, I read all the books, built all the models, ate Space Food sticks for lunch and saw that Star Wars movie ever so many times. My only problem is that I haven't got the required $20 million fee.

So, if there's anyone out there reading this with a good heart and a bit of spare cash, I promise I'll pay them back just as soon as I can. I'll even let them hold my Visa card.

Butt according to Jay-Lo...
Any doubters left? Yet another sign of the coming appocalypse.

Kieran gets all political 'n stuff
It's a bright and sunny Tuesday which is now, thanks to European regulation, the second and NOT the third day of the week. Here in Britain, Anti-Europeans complain about every regulation and directive to come out of Brussels, from the quantity of milk-fat allowed in chocolate to the much hated (but actually pretty cool) European Single Currency. Nothing slips by their eagle-eyes.

Yet not once have I heard a Brit complain, tut quietly or even raise an eyebrow suggestively over this whole "Le week el starto on Montag" thing. That's probably because no one even knows about it. But I'll bet if they did they'd be pretty mad; Those that knew the week used to start on a Sunday. Actually, most of them probably wouldn't give much of a damn either. They've got bigger fish to fry...

British Pre-Schoolers are being taught to dial 112 instead of 999 (that's 000 for the Aussies and 911 for the Yanks and Cannucks) by running their hands up their face and counting the bumps. "One Mouth, One Nose, Two Eyes!" while the Europhobes roll their sharp eyes and think of Branston Pickle.

Imagine! 999 going the way of the traditional British Sausage! It's enough to make you go out buy some traditional "British High-Fat Extruded Offel and Meat-like Product."

And yet Eurosceptics are curiously quiet on the whole new calendar front. From where I'm sitting, that's just not good enough!

If only Tony could rile them up over this calendar thing, then perhaps he could slip the Euro currency legislation by in the dead of night. "OK, we may have to give up the pound, but I've saved THE BRITISH WEEK!"

Those new Euro coins are so purdy. I say Bring on the shiny!

P.S. Wherever you are in the world, 112 is the only number you can dial when your Nokia mobile phone is locked. Try it!

Respeck the dog puppet
I don't know why, but I stayed up to watch the MTV awards the other night. One of the more entertaining moments occured when a puppet by the name of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog interviewed Moby about talentless hack Eminem's well documented antipathy towards him. Moby played along good naturedly and showed a great deal of class not responding when Eminem got up and continued his ridiculous tirade against the new age dance/pop artist (and blogger).

Here at kaymc we know that when it comes down to a tussle between a talented musician/blogger and try-hard gangsta wannabe (who says nasty things about his mother), well we know which side our bread is buttered on. Here's what Moby had to say on his blog about the whole ugly affair:

i think that eminem is talented and interesting but i'm kind of stunned at the anger that he has for me seeing as i'd never met him up until last night.

and i love 'triumph the insult comic dog'.

and i was more concerned for triumph's well-being.if eminem wants to pick on someone, fine, pick on me, but don't diss the dog-puppet. triumph the dog-puppet is my hero.

that's the sole reason that i went to the vma's.

cos i love that little dog-puppet.

Respeck the puppet, man.

You can read Moby's full entry by clicking here.

Lest we forget
Remember, only you have the power to Save the Kalamazoo One!

Freak 'o the week
Oh dear. Oh, dear oh deary me. This site is just so out there, that you really want to believe it's satire; That somewhere there are a bunch of lesbian pranksters with a very dark sense of humour and too much time on their hands.

Sadly, I don't think that's the case.

No, this guy's exactly what he appears to be. An idiot. With issues.

And you can thank your deity of choice for those issues, because they've given all of us the chance to share the love with Pittsburgh's very own Steve Lasuk, our Freak 'o the Week!

Steve attempts to shine the light of truth on what he believes to be an international conspiracy of lesbians, but instead reveals far more about his own paranoia and insecurities. It really is the classic example of the message conveyed being the exact opposite of the one intended.

I'm going to send an email to the people behind Dictonary.com and suggest they link the definition of Dramatic Irony directly to Steve's site.

(Link via Gert)

Promises and songs
Why do they have to make those PC fans so damn loud?

I promise I will never drink again, or at least until I've forgotten what this hangover feels like. The first time I made that promise, I kept it for nearly a year. When I finally gave in and drank again the memories were still so vivid that the contents of that first glass almost tasted sour. My second promise lasted all of 4 months. The time after that? Probably a month or two. This time?

Ahem.

So, I saw Kristin Chenoweth in concert AGAIN last night. Her performance was even tighter than on Tuesday night. I am constantly astounded by her vocal range and her ability to sell a song. Despite that, I'd advise against seeing the same concert twice in the same week. There was something so surreal about listening to the same scripted patter between songs, the same rehearsed facial expressions, comedic takes and body movements.

Tuesday night was press night and so the reviewer for the Telegraph saw the same performance I did. His rave review entirely matched my own sentiment, however he did comment on a moment during particularly emotional rendering of My Funny Valentine where Kristin seemed to catch herself and choke down a sob. His review made it clear that he entirely bought the sincerity of that reaction. Or course, when you see the same concert four days later and she chokes back that same sob at the same point in the song, well it makes it harder to believe.

Let me be clear, Kristin Chenoweth in concert has set a new benchmark. In terms of musical theatre or cabaret, I have never heard anything to match what I experienced last night.

My live musical highlights (in no particular order)

• They Might Be Giants (in London)
• Cecilia Bartoli (in London)
• The first time I saw The Magic Flute (at the Sydney Opera House)
• INXS (in Sydney)
• Kristin Chenoweth (twice in London)
• Prokofiev's Romeo and Juliet (at la Scala in Milan)